A Little Perspective From Tom Church

I recently read A Clockwork Orange, a small novella by Anthony Burgess, and the title of this post pretty much sums the entire story up.

Starting with the next paragraph, I’m going to start speaking in the dialect of the youth in Burgess’s dystopian creation. (Don’t worry- if you really want to, you can take a look at the bottom; I’ll translate everything for you down there, in order with this post)

*Spoiler Alert, and all that*

For one thing, a very appealing part of this story was the Russe-derived nadsat-speak- nadsat being a common teenager. Nadsats roamed the nightstreets in shaikas of droogs, doing the starry in-and-out on occasion, and never failing to sod cal up.

Once past the nadsat-talk, the story is very raw. Alex, the main character, and his circle spill the holy krovvy and keeshkas from all the innocent lewdies they come upon, making sure to swipe all their cutter. Alex commonly deals awful lomticks to the innocents with his trusty britva, which most nadsats seem to have.

The story develops a message: One of reform and turning baddiwad lewdies into dobby vecks. Burgess asks in the introduction: But at what cost? Well, it seems that side effects of this mysterious new method end up vredding Alex more than any veck is willing to viddy.

What sloochats is that Alex is abandoned in a raid on an starry soomka’s domy. The rozzes take him to Staja and throw him in with a bunch of other prestoopniks. He’s framed for oobivatting a veck who’s thrown in with them after staying there for two whole years.

He’s put in a program designed to reform young, violent prestoopniks through classical conditioning. This involves viddying and slooshying violent acts on a telly screen while feeling positively bolnoy. He is injected and left on his oddy-knocky to creech and whine all he wants, restricted at the shiyah, litso, and glazzies with a special shlem to keep him focused on the films.

After being kicked out, Alex can no longer commit to violence or in-and-out-type acts, which make make him so bolnoy that he may even be endangering his jeezny. He returns to his pee and em only to be rejected. When he confronts a starry veck about a past offense, a whole bunch of them shaika up on him and clop him around. He cannot physically drat back. Two rozzes show up and pull him into the police auto with him: he finds that they used to be nadsats he knew, one of them even being his past-faithful droog. They clop him up good and leave him out in the country.

He goes to the nearest domy and is welcomed with great hospitality. The starry veck who takes care of him turns out to be the same veck whose wife he and his shaika raped and oobivatted years ago. The veck doesn’t quite catch on. He uses him as part of a political campaign to knock out the starry gruppa in charge of the government, welcoming several other starry vecks into his domy to collaborate on a plan. I won’t give away the rest of this book, I suppose: pick it up from your local biblio.

Now, for those of you who are interested at all: this book is a realy grahzny bratchny. Period. This book is dark, foul, and completely horrorshow. But it really is a good read, O my brothers, and I daresay one of refinement could find mental solace in such a controversial read. G’day.

Thom
aestheism, not atheism

[BONUS TRANSLATIONS]

Russe: Russian-derived
nadsat: teen
shaika: gang
droog: gang member
starry: old
in-and-out: sex/rape
sod: f***
cal: shit
krovvy: blood
keeshkas: guts
lewdies: people
cutter: money
lomticks: cuts/slashes
britva: sword, knife, blade
baddiwad: bad
dobby: good
vecks: guys
vredding: hurting
viddy: see
sloochats: happens
soomka: woman
domy: house
rozzes: cops
Staja: state jail
prestoopniks: offenders
oobivatting: killing
slooshying: hearing:
telly: television
bolnoy: sick
oddy-knocky: lonesome/own
creech: scream
shiyah: neck
litso: face
glazzies: eyes
shlem: helmet
jeezny: life
pee and em: papa and mother
clop: beat/smack
drat: fight
auto: car
gruppa: group
biblio: library
grahzny: dirty
bratchny: bastard/bitch
horrorshow: sick (in a way that could also mean cool)

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